Bug Eyed Monsters by Jean Ure

Author:Jean Ure
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC
Published: 2012-09-09T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter Five

Not a Normal Human

Joe and Harry could hardly wait to get back and give the others their news.

‘Man!’ cried Ryan, when he heard. ‘That is awesome!’

‘Awesome,’ agreed Bal. He chortled. ‘The plot thickens!’

‘Reckon it’s all the proof we need. Couldn’t hardly believe it,’ said Joe. ‘Little black box thing, strapped on his wrist!’

‘Right out in the open,’ marvelled Harry. ‘You’d have thought at least he’d keep it somewhere people couldn’t see.’

‘Shows he doesn’t care,’ said Joe. ‘Just cos we’re not as advanced as his lot, he prob’ly thinks we don’t know about UFOs and stuff.’

‘Yeah.’ Ryan nodded. ‘Like we’re so dumb we can’t recognise a cloaking device when we see one.’

There was a pause.

‘I suppose it was a cloaking device?’ said Bal.

Joe looked at him in some annoyance. ‘What else could it be?’

‘I dunno! A watch, maybe?’

‘Wasn’t a watch,’ said Harry.

‘Compass? In case he gets lost?’

‘How could he get lost, just running down the road?’

‘Could if he didn’t have any sense of direction. Like if aliens don’t understand left and right same as we do.’

‘There was that one time,’ said Ryan, doubtfully, ‘when he told us the right hand didn’t know what the left hand was doing. I mean, what’s that about? You’d have to be pretty stupid, not knowing what your hands were doing.’

‘Not if you were an alien,’ said Bal. ‘Just means you’re built different. Like maybe on his home planet he goes by smell, or something. Vibrations. Like an insect, sort of thing. So then he comes to Earth and he gets all confused. Has to have a compass. That’s all I’m saying.’

‘Yeah, well, you weren’t there,’ said Joe. ‘You didn’t see it. We did. Anyway, Harry’s granddad reckoned it was a cloaking device. Didn’t he?’

‘He did,’ said Harry.

It was true that Gran had told him not to be so silly, but what did Gran know? She’d probably gone to an all-girls’ school where they didn’t have aliens. Or if they did, she wouldn’t have recognised them. He wasn’t being sexist! Miss Beam didn’t like it when they were sexist. He just reckoned Granddad knew a bit more about aliens than Gran.

‘’cording to Harry’s granddad,’ said Joe, ‘there’s always been aliens on the staff. Didn’t even look human, half of ‘em. That’s what he said. What was the name of that one? Gottleby, or something?’

‘Gorraby,’ said Harry. ‘Mr Gorraby.’

‘What kind of name is that?’ said Bal.

‘Kind of name,’ said Joe, ‘that’d appeal to an alien. Same like Snitcher. I bet what they do, I bet they Google on their computers for lists of human names, then pick out the ones they like. Stands to reason they’d like different ones from us.’

‘Why?’ said Bal.

‘Cos they’re aliens!’

Bal said, ‘Mm. Maybe.’

‘Dunno why you always have to argue’, said Joe. And then, very quickly, before Bal could start up again, ‘Know what we ought to do? See if we can find this Gorraby guy in a school photo. See what he looked like.’

Even Bal was prepared to admit that this was a good idea.

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